What do you call a sad strawberry?

Alright, I already don't have anything to say.  I just started reading "It" by request of my bestie, Sarah.  I'm 146 pages in. Normally I read non-fiction so this is a bit of a change. I am real sad that Georgie died.  I remember being scared of the basement when I was little, too. Now I'm scared of the attic.  I'm pretty sure we have a squatter up there.  Once I watched a movie about a guy who lived in the attic and he ended up murdering the whole family.  That would be my luck.  Today I did nothing.  I did pack and clean.  I can actually see my bedroom floor this evening. My family love to tell people about the one time I found a fork in my bed.  I'm not actually sure how it got there but it makes sense.  I just sleep on one side so shit just ends up over there.  I wake up with earrings stuck in my back all the time.  I am probably the laziest person you will ever meet.  It's not like your typical lazy tho. I feel like I have to work hard to be this lazy. The key is to not have too many friends.  If you do, they will expect shit from you. I'm lucky because I only have a few and these few know not to ask me to do anything because it's not happening.  It does suck when you have siblings thought.  It's even worse when they are girls. Kara made me go to a wedding with her recently.  She knows I don't enjoy other people's happiness.  It turned out to be alright because I planned my future wedding.  There was a girl with funny eyebrows there too so that was fun... and a guy that Kara nicknamed Big Booty Judy. That made me giggle.  Moving on, I made a lesbian on Sims today by accident.  I told my dad (check him out in the "picture of the day" below) and his reply was "well, me and your mom did too."  While we are on the topic of lesbians let me tell you how I feel about them.  I never want to be one.  They are moody and sensitive.  Also, that's two weeks out of the month that one of y'all are on your period.  That sucks for multiple reasons.  Now my sister is more like a gay man.  If a gay man loves it, so does she.  Well not the obvious thing... She makes me watch drag shows which I hate.  They are fine I guess but I just wish there was a chair to sit in while I watch.  I'm short and people get in my way.  Not to mention the fact that every time we go to the gay bar now I'm sure there's going to be an active shooter. Sad, but true. I'm not a hero people.  I will leave you. I'll save my nephews but I doubt they will be at a bar. I want to tell you more on how to be a professional lazy person.  Basically, all you have to do is nothing so people expect it from you. Don't clean you car or your room.  Then, when you do clean it's like an added bonus. Don't ever commit to anything. If you ever get stuck just blame it on diarrhea.  No one wants details about poop.  Don't rely on dry shampoo.. it doesn't work. You just have to take one for the team and get in the shower.  I won't judge you if you sit in the shower though. The struggle is real my friends.  I also try really hard to wear basic clothes to work.  Pick something that is really close to pajamas but not. Next time you're running late and throw on those leggings and old teesh it will be fine because your coworkers expect that from you. I feel like this is great advice.  Now if you are trying to do good in life maybe don't follow this but if you're just trying to make it through each day I'd give it a go. It's a blueberry btw. Alright, I guess that's all I got tonight.  I'm going to read now. Peace, Love, Happiness!